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FREE FUNNY PSYCHIC ANSWERS
PSYCHIC
"BERNARD"
Psychic Bernard knows ALL the ANSWERS to ALL your QUESTIONS. He is an Expert Psychic with regards to LOVE, MONEY, and ALL THINGS of the FUTURE. He is Dedicated, Focused, Determined and a Total and Complete IDIOT. (yes, like most Psychics)
SO ASK YOUR QUESTIONS AND BEHOLD YOUR DESTINY !
YES YOU CAN!
BUT first you must have these attributes:
1) You must enjoy LYING ... maybe as a kid everything you said was a TOTAL LIE! (good for you you little bastard!
2) You must have NO MORALS, simply because everything you tell as a PSYCHIC is TOTAL AND COMPLETE BULLSHIT!
3) You must learn to take ALL THE MONEY you can from your poor desparate clients. Then KEEP squeezing for more and TAKE IT ALL! ..... (It's your JOB!)
4) Try not to think about the fact that you are a LOWLIFE WALKING PIECE OF CRAP ....but when counting all the money you STOLE that day, keep your THUMB firmly stuck up your ASS for some comfort!
5) Don't con other PSYCHICS.... They'll just RIP YOUR HEAD OFF! (and try to stay out of prision!) In a word let's sum it up this way and PLEASE take no offense:
QUESTION: Can I make a living as a PSYCHIC?
PSYCHIC BERNARD'S ANSWER
and so am I........SO SAY PSYCHIC BERNARD
ALL PSYCHICS ARE FULL OF SHIT
